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I had never been with a girl and most of mu friends always talked about some girl that the had felt up or had sex with. All I could do was listen and nod my head in agreement. The closest I had ever came to seeing a girl naked was the time I walked in on my cousin as she was changing clothes. I turned and ran from the house like some one was chasing me. So when I was sexually assaulted by three guys my mind went into a depressingly downward spiral. I was too ashamed to report what had happen since I was skipping class and had voluntarily joined in with them as they ran past me, I was dumbfounded as to what to do. To make matters worst the next time that they did the same thing I still did not report them and after that they used me as their fuck toy when ever and shared me with their friends or told others that I was an easy fuck. All because I was to terrified to fight back or put up a defensive battle. It only took a few slaps from any one of them I did just as they wanted. It had. Not take it.When you're hurt by someone who can't feel pain, you wish you never fell in love. Never in lust, never started talking, never meeting. You wish you could erase their smell so you wouldn't ever have to think about why you remember it so well. You wish you can't vividly remember how their arms felt and how they were once so welcoming.When you love someone who doesn't love you back, you are pathetic. You cry in bed while replaying your first kiss, first date, the time you fell asleep together. You can remember every feeling from the first time you felt love to the first time your heart skipped a beat because, well, it was ending. You remember the goosebumps running down your back when you last touched her hand as you left her home in Newark. That was the last time you'd be in her presents And that was the last time you touched her leathery skin that was wet from your tears. And that was the last time she would know how much you loved her.You replay every memory over and over.
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